Becky (not her real name) was referred to NCDV by the Police. From the outside, her marriage to Jason (not his real name) appeared to be a perfect. Jason, a successful businessman, Becky, a stay-at-home mum to two young children, Emma and Noah. But behind closed doors, it was far from perfect!
The abuse started subtly, at first. Hurtful comments which he said were “constructive criticism” or “just a joke,” Jason’s unpredictable temper was always lurking just beneath the surface. Over time, those comments became slaps, and the slaps turned into punches. Becky – once a confident and happy woman – became a shadow of her former self. She became quiet and subdued, always trying to second guess Jason and trying not to make him ‘angry’.
The children, too young to understand the abuse and violence, were still affected by it. Emma, at six, asked why her mother cried so often, why her face was sometimes swollen and bruised She would often say to people “Mummy’s eyes were leaking”. Noah, barely four, clung to his mother’s leg whenever Jason was around, sensing his mother was afraid. Becky would tell herself that Jason had never hit her in front of the children so they couldn’t be that badly affected by the abuse!
One evening, however, Jason’s rage reached a boiling point. After a trivial argument about money, he punched Becky, knocking her to the ground. Emma screamed. Noah hid in the corner, shaking, as he watched Becky struggle to get up. It was in that moment that Becky knew something had to change.
Days passed. Emma had become quieter and more withdrawn, while Noah started wetting the bed at night. Becky couldn’t ignore the signs. Her children were suffering, too.
Becky knew she had to find a way out, for her children, and for herself. But each attempt to leave was met with either threats from Jason or promises that it would not happen again. In the end, the promises that is would not happen again stopped and Becky knew she was not leaving because of fear, not love!
It wasn’t until the night Jason went too far – beating her badly and stamping on her phone so that she could not call anyone for help, that Becky knew she had to leave. She felt very afraid that Jason would kill her. She managed to get his phone and called the Police. When the Police arrived, they arrested Jason. Becky declined to go to the hospital to get her injuries checked over as she didn’t want to leave the children or her home, but she did agree for them to refer her to NCDV. Jason was kept in the cells for the night and the next day he was bailed to stay away from the house, Becky and the children, pending further investigation. This window of opportunity enabled Becky to call NCDV, who allocated her to one of its panel solicitors. Becky was given a 12-month non-molestation injunction, and crucially, an Occupation Order, which meant that Jason was not allowed to go near the house and Becky could stay in the house with her children whilst she was deciding what her future held.
As far as we know, Becky and the children remain protected by the court orders and there have been no further incidents.
