In this series we are using the brave stories of domestic abuse survivors to bring hope to others currently facing abuse. Their stories are sadly not unique, the victims share them willingly to help others get the support they did.
Anna* (*not her real name) contacted NCDV after a friend from a women’s refuge gave her the number.
Anna experienced physical violence throughout the marriage, along with emotional and verbal abuse. She also endured controlling behaviour and her husband resorted to Involving others to intimidate her after the marriage ended.
Here Anna tells her own story:
“Only married for relatively few years, I was physically abused by my ex husband throughout the majority of our marriage. He would punch, kick, slap, push and grab me.
I was always too afraid of him to report him to the police.
He would also be verbally abusive and call me horrible names such as “bitch”.
He would put me down and says that women should only cook and clean.
He did not want me to have any friends in the local area and when I went out, he would often come with me as he did not want me to go out on my own.
Eventually I told Social Services who told the police and I went into a refuge. I got an injunction against him and divorced him but the abuse did not stop there.
He found out where I was and breached the order by sending me abusive letters.
After that order ended, he then got other people to come to my address to intimidate me.”
We were able to offer Anna help and support, we assisted her by listening to her on the phone, preparing her witness statement for her along with the court application form.
We provided her with a lot of information about what to expect at Court and answered all her queries so that she was reassured.
She was particularly reassured that when she called to speak to the pro bono manager, she would always get a call back quickly to help with her queries.
A positive outcome was achieved for Anna – a 12 month non molestation order was granted to protect her from her abuser. This forbids him from contacting her in anyway and prevents him using a third party to abuse her.
Anna in her own words:
“Without NCDV I would not be here.”
“Any victim of domestic violence should go to NCDV as they are the only ones who understand and the only ones who help and support the victims.”
“I was so vulnerable, nobody listened to me but NCDV gave me a gift for 2020″